"Time heals all wounds..."

I'm beginning to wonder how true that really is. 

I know that with time the wounds become healthier, yes... but the scar that is left is a constant reminder of the wound it once resembled. A small glance at the scar and all those memories flood back. 

That glance feels similar to a car accident this year. That scar haunts me. It echos in my memory. It still knocks the wind out of me, and leads me into a darkness. It's so hard to explains sometimes. The best way to describe it is entirely terrifying. Remembering how low my spirits were and how much darkness consumed my heart. Reminding me each passing day as I catch a glance of who I was and how hard my heart was. I can see all the growth, the wonderful blessings that have come because of it, but it still scares me that somehow I will revert to that era. That my heart will grow bitter, and I will throw my identity to the wind. That I will forget how wonderful and good God is regardless of circumstance. 

Tonight is a reminder that the scar on my heart was once a chasm-like wound. 

I still have to choose to be happy, and I am awaiting the day when that choice is easier.